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Men Are Just Happier People-- What do you expect from

such simple creatures? Your last name stays put. The

garage is all yours. Wedding plans take care of

themselves. Chocolate is just another snack.


You can be President. You can never be pregnant. You

can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. You can wear

NO shirt to a water park. Car mechanics tell you the

truth.


The world is your urinal. You never have to drive to

another gas station restroom because this one is just

too icky. You don't have to stop and think of which

way to turn a nut on a bolt. Same work, more pay.


Wrinkles add character. Wedding dress $5000. Tux

rental-$100. People never stare at your chest when

you're talking to them. The occasional well-rendered

belch is practically expected.


New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet. One

mood all the time. Phone conversations are over in 30

seconds flat. You know stuff about tanks. A five-day

vacation requires only one suitcase. You can open all

your own jars. You get extra credit for the slightest

act of thoughtfulness. If someone forgets to invite

you, he or she can still be your friend.


Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack. Three pairs

of shoes are more than enough. You almost never have

strap problems in public. You are unable to see

wrinkles in your clothes.


Everything on your face stays its original color. The

same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades. You

only have to shave your face and neck.


You can play with toys all your life. Your belly

usually hides your big hips. One wallet and one pair

of shoes one color for all seasons. You can wear

shorts no matter how your legs look.


You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife. You have

freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache. You

can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December

24 in 25 minutes.


No wonder men are happier

Send this to the women who can handle it and to the

men who will enjoy reading it.


:bat


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