Giving a check as a wedding gift

  • Thread starter Thread starter Karry
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Karry

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We have 2 weddings coming up. One on Saturday and another on 9/5. I am going to give the couple a check as a wedding gift along with a few goodies too. I like to give the gift a few days before the wedding so they can enjoy opening it and have a chance to CASH the check before the wedding/honeymoon. :) My ?: who should I make the check out to? I can't make it out to Colleen and Paul Smith because they may not have a joint account yet and the bride's name isn't official yet. Should I make it out to just either the bride or the groom, or use the bride's maiden name and the groom's name also. :dizzy
 
well, you could make it out to me :lol

Ok.. guess not.
But how about making it out to Paul OR karen Smith?
 
Generally we make out the check in the grooms name. Rarely does his name change after the wedding. :D
I doubt the bride will think "gee, they didn't give me a gift!" if her name is not on the check.
 
I have left the check blank and they can fill in as they want that way no one is offended,my nephew that gets married this month,we are sending him a check,he is hoping before the wedding his name change goes in from Kramarczyk to LaCount,since his Dad died this year and they did NOT have a good relationship he is changing his name to his moms maiden name,so I am leaving the check blank.
 
=eek Korina that is NOT a wise idea. Checks do get stolen in the mail.....and envelopes at wedding receptions get stolen too. I know that first hand as my niece had a huge number of them stolen at here wedding from the gift table. They suspected who did it but couldn't prove it till months later. It was Kim's cousin's (on the other side of the family) boyfriend and the local hotel where they were staying at found cards and checks stashed between the mattress and boxspring when they did a rehab of the rooms. He took the cash but didn't try to cash the checks. Now why he put them between the mattress and not just put them in a dumpster. Charges were filed against this guy and he plead out and did make some restitution but it caused a real family feud.

Karry, to make sure there are not hurt feelings you could do John Smith or Susie Jones.
 
[size=x-large]DO NOT LEAVE THAT CHECK BLANK![/size]

as Denise said, it is not a good idea at all.
If that check goes astray, someone can fill it in as they wish and cash it.
I also agree with Denise that when giving money, it is not wise to take it to the wedding reception and leave it or hand it to someone.
 
::o::o::o DON'T DISPLAY CHECKS OR CASH ON GIFT TABLES EITHER!!! How dumb is that????

And Karry....you are absolutely correct in giving the wedding gift ahead of time. When did it become okay to take a wedding gift to the ....I was going to say church but that happens so rarely now....wedding or reception venue! I was watching a tv program recently and taking the gift to the wedding is listed as one of the worst blunders a wedding guest can make! Wedding gifts are supposed to be sent to the brides home well in advance of the wedding!!!
 
Wow,I dint even think of that,as usual my dumb mind,oh well,guess I will make it out to her,lol!
 
I would make it out to either the bride or groom, depending on my personal connection to the wedding-If you are sending it early and the bride is your connection to the wedding, leave it in her maiden name.
 
[quote Beryl]::o::o::o DON'T DISPLAY CHECKS OR CASH ON GIFT TABLES EITHER!!! [/quote]

They weren't open on display per sey, there was a drop basket for folks to leave them. With everyone milling around at the reception who would have throught but then live and learn and it did indeed turn into a dumb idea unfortunately....just something you wouldn't expect of friends and family, cause as it turned out the cousin knew he did it and she and Kim were close as sisters and now that relationship is lost.
 
Make it out in either name. Bride's if you are on the brides' side or Groom's. The bride will have to change things over after the wedding and there will be a period where she can use either name. Just write in the memo what it is for.
Note: if you make it out to the "other" person and the wedding doesn't go thru, you can kiss that check good-by.

Yes checks do go astray. I just finished writing one for property taxes on our other house. I know I sent it because I pay both on the same day. Not happy with the post office right now because I had to pay a penalty.
 
Nieciez said:
just something you wouldn't expect of friends and family,
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Oh....I'd expect it...in fact, I'm afraid to say I would count on it! Not only do family and friends attend these types of functions with "partners" that you might not know as well as you think but there are always caterers, waitstaff, barstaff and so on that you know absolutely nothing about! It is not good to put temptation in the way of some people. I'm sorry your niece and her husband learned a hard lesson on such a special occassion. So disappointing for them and for those who gave gifts that were never received :( !
 
[quote nieciez][quote Beryl]::o::o::o DON'T DISPLAY CHECKS OR CASH ON GIFT TABLES EITHER!!! [/quote]

They weren't open on display per sey, there was a drop basket for folks to leave them. With everyone milling around at the reception who would have throught but then live and learn and it did indeed turn into a dumb idea unfortunately....just something you wouldn't expect of friends and family, cause as it turned out the cousin knew he did it and she and Kim were close as sisters and now that relationship is lost.[/quote]

Where I work each ballroom has those round video surveillance cameras in the ceilings as well as in all lobbies and halls. This way if something goes "missing", they can check it out.
 
Herb....don't think I'd find those cameras at the wedding reception venues in this neck of the woods(it's not a very big town) and many receptions occur at places like The Days Inn reception room, the Eagles Hall, Heidi's Restaurant, the Colombo Hall, and so on....maybe though!
 
I remember one large ethinic wedding we were invited to in city friends advised us ahead of time tradition was to hand envelope with check to the grooms mother as you went thru the reception line.
 
[quote Beryl]Herb....don't think I'd find those cameras at the wedding reception venues in this neck of the woods(it's not a very big town) and many receptions occur at places like The Days Inn reception room, the Eagles Hall, Heidi's Restaurant, the Colombo Hall, and so on....maybe though![/quote]

The reason they got the video surveillance cameras where I work was that the management got sick and tired of guests immediately accusing the staff of missing items.
 
Herb, it's not nice to accuse staff but I think people just don't want to believe their friends and relatives would be up to such tricks!! Actually one can't every accuse anybody without proof....at least they shouldn't!! You can think it, or wonder about it but you shouldn't actually accuse someone when you can't prove anything.
 
Beryl, You said
When did it become okay to take a wedding gift to the ....
Click to expand...

I have to say that's the oddest thing I've heard in a long time. Perhaps its a regional difference. But I would never would even think to NOT to bring the gift.

I come from a huge family. I must have attended well over 100 weddings in my life, and there's been a heavily laden gift table with a card box at every single one of them. Not bringing a gift would be extremely weird. In our family.If you sent the gift ahead of time the bridal couple would probably be very confused about whether you were coming to the wedding. or not; since sending the gift ahead is usually only done by the people who cannot make it to the wedding.

BTW, I've never seen an open card box at a wedding that someone could reach into. It's always been a very large box, beautifully gift wrapped and ribboned, with merely a long slot for dropping in the cards. You can't open the thing unless you rip it apart. (A thief would have to carry the entire box out of the party.) The gift table is so common a tradition at weddings around here,(and the bringing of the gifts) I don't think I've ever seen otherwise, even at non-family weddings. As a matter of fact people rent the card boxes from the party supply stores, at least they did from the store where my son was a party planner for a few years. (You still have to take the box apart to get it open.)

I have to think that a custom so commonly accepted, existing over so many years, would have to be considered "okay".
 


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